Stale Grapes News Post #6

Hello, and once again, welcome to another segment of the Stale Grapes News Network, the site where fake news blog posts could be real news that is being hidden by today’s mainstream media. Now for some more fake news, courtesy of me:

What Candy Should You Never Eat?

[Atlanta, New Jersey] In a recent poll by the Snellman Avalanche, people living in the city of Minneapolis, Nebraska listed several candies that should never be consumed.

And the top 10 candies are as follows:

  1. Fudge Bits
  2. Grape Toffee
  3. Megamints
  4. Rice Cremes
  5. Jellyplums
  6. Sugary Gummis
  7. Blueberry Taffy
  8. Glonuts
  9. Dark Popcorn Surprise
  10. Chocowatermelon Gel

These candies have been deemed “unsafe for human consumption” by the Department for Junk Food Regulation. Yet why people insist on eating these candies instead of the candies that are high in healthy stuff is very astounding indeed.

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Police to Blame Home Invasion Victim for Own Murder

[Inglewood, North Dakota] – Today, the Inglewood Police Department has issued a statement blaming 38-year-old Darla Branch for her own murder during a home invasion robbery. The woman in question had had her doors locked and an alarm in place, but she made the foolish mistake of leaving a key and the code to the alarm underneath the doormat of her front door, which enabled Alejandro Wolfe to have access to the house and eventually murder Darla.

It’s a sad day when we’re forced to blame the victim for what happened to her, but there is no excuse for what she did,” said Police chief Michael Wilkins. “Mrs. Branch should have arranged for someone to pick her daughters instead of leaving everything to chance. Hasn’t she heard of laving a neighbor watching her children?

Wolfe is expected to be arraigned on December 18, 2014.

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And that’s all that I have for this week. Stay tuned for more shockingly fake but possibly true news from the Stale Grapes News Network.

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